The 7 C's of Resilience - Character

Character

In our fast-paced society, we face many challenges when we try to raise young people with character. Our culture values personal success, so how do we make sure that our children are hard workers but still value kindness, cooperation, sharing, and caring for other people? In a society that fosters winning the prize, how do we reinforce that it is how we play the game that defines us as humans? In a world in which independence is a hallmark of success, how do we convey that the finest people are those who can admit they need others to achieve contentment?

These questions pose some of the heftiest challenges of our times. The answers are not easy, but as parents our role is to try to meet the challenge of raising children with character, even as the pace of the world continually increases. Character development does not come in a bottle, nor will it come through a lecture. Telling kids how to act ("Be nice to your sister"), how to care ("You should be kinder to the new kid in your class"), and what to value ("Honesty is important") is simply not enough and usually won't work.

Children will learn character by the values you teach, your words of praise, or the way you correct them. They'll learn character by observing your values and behavior in daily interactions outside your home and watching how adults treat each other in your home. A "Parent's Guide to Building Resilience in Children and Teens: Giving Your Child Roots and Wings" offers some suggestions that are designed to spark conversations. The suggestions are not intended as a definitive list of everything needed to build character, but to act as trigger for conversation with other adults who care about your children's developing character.

The 7 C's of Resilience

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Excerpted from the AAP Patient Education brochure, "Helping Your Child Cope With Life" published by the American Academy of Pediatrics. Copyright © 2006 American Academy of Pediatrics. All rights reserved.