The 7 C's of Resilience - Coping

Coping
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Stress makes us terribly uncomfortable. We feel nervous, unsafe, insecure, and ungrounded. We can't think clearly. We become restless, lose sleep, become tired, and maybe get headaches. Our muscles ache, our bellies feel bloated, and our hearts throb. We grow irritable, less patient, and much less understanding of others.

Children experience many of the same feelings, but the big difference is that they often don't understand the connections between their unsettling emotions, physical symptoms, and underlying stress that drives their moodiness or irritability. That's where parents need to consider whether their child's moods, isolation, tantrums, hostility, or even rage may be signs of depression.

Children's bodies can accumulate stress just as our adult bodies do. Your pediatrician should evaluate your child anytime you're worried about his health. Frequent patterns of headaches, belly pain, and/or fatigue tend to point to the possibility that stress is driving those uncomfortable feelings.

The stress-reduction strategies offered throughout this site may be useful in helping your child manage existing stress. Children who have a wide variety of coping strategies are less likely to turn to those dangerous quick fixes we fear. We hope that children who are well equipped to deal with stress will experience less of it in the first place. If you are worried about your child's ability to cope, remember that you are so madly in love with your child that you can't always be objective. Use your child's teacher, counselor, pediatrician, or clergy to help you decide the level of support your child needs.

One important note: The AAP offers your preteen and teen an opportunity to develop their own coping strategies. Don't wait until your child is in trouble, this is prevention at its best! Suggest that your child visits www.aap.org/stress and look for the Teens Only section to develop their own plan.

The 7 C's of Resilience

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Excerpted from the AAP Patient Education brochure, "Helping Your Child Cope With Life" published by the American Academy of Pediatrics. Copyright © 2006 American Academy of Pediatrics. All rights reserved.